{"id":79,"date":"2015-08-01T23:00:47","date_gmt":"2015-08-02T03:00:47","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/antipills.com\/?page_id=79"},"modified":"2020-04-06T13:04:22","modified_gmt":"2020-04-06T17:04:22","slug":"rictus-barnfangs-anti-truth-tablets","status":"publish","type":"page","link":"https:\/\/antipills.com\/index.php\/empty-medicine-jars-with-detailed-satirical-labels\/rictus-barnfangs-anti-truth-tablets\/","title":{"rendered":"Rictus Barnfang’s “Anti-Truth Tablets”"},"content":{"rendered":"

Solace Ex Negatium\u00a0<\/em> ''Comfort From Denial\"\u00a0 . . . Substantia Ex Promisis\u00a0<\/em> ''Wealth From Promises\"<\/p>\n<\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div>

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What Wonder Hath The March of Science Wrought?!<\/h3>\n

!! A Pill-Shaped Potion for Prevarication !!<\/h4>\n

Are you among the MILLIONS afflicted with chronic honesty?
Let\u2019s face it friend, the true and accurate recounting of reality
is a bane to the happiness of mankind second only to the
Grim Reaper Himself ! Never again be a slave to things as
they are ! This astonishing remedy will empower you to bend
facts to fit your fancy and forever banish the Tragic Specter
of TRUTH from your life !<\/p>\n

\"Each and every tablet in my formula is taken back in time by
MYSELF Personally! They are chanted over for DECADES by the
Clairvoyant Monks of Atlantis, then aged several centuries inside
the trunk of an Enchanted Cyprus. Once they are ripe, I insert
a single molecule of Electrum into the center of EACH tablet!
With Great Effort and Mystical Skill, I bring them all back
through time to the present!\u00a0\u00a0 (Then some guy in a hair net puts
them into these bottles.)\"\u00a0 -\u00a0 Rictus Barnfang<\/p>\n

\u00a9 2015 www.antipills.com - This Novelty\/Entertainment container was sold empty.
Do not ingest any contents, edible or otherwise, unless you placed it in here yourself!<\/h6>\n<\/div><\/div><\/div>

Defeat Your Addiction to Facts!<\/h3>

Finally be a Friend of Fiction! Fling Falsehoods with
Frenetic Frenzy and enjoy YEARS of Fabulous Fibbing!
Delight and comfort all of your many new-found friends
and followers with groundless platitudes, blissfully
conveyed ignorance and outright bald-faced LIES!!<\/p>

\" I took only a single dose of Rictus Barnfang's<\/em><\/strong>
Anti-Truth Pills and now I tell MAGNIFICENT<\/em><\/strong>
WHOPPERS with pride and confidence at<\/em><\/strong>
nearly abusive volume!! \u201d - Satisfied Customer<\/em><\/strong><\/p>

Every container of Anti-Truth Tablets features my
nearly patented 'Inertia-Plotz Placement Technology'
AT NO EXTRA CHARGE!!
(These pills will remain exactly where they were last
set down if no other force acts upon them! )<\/p>

A Rampant Release of Imagination and Heedless Gall in Every Dose!<\/h4><\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div>
<\/div><\/div><\/div>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Solace Ex Negatium\u00a0 ”Comfort From Denial”\u00a0 . . . Substantia Ex Promisis\u00a0 ”Wealth From Promises”<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"parent":76,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","template":"page-fullwidth.php","meta":{"footnotes":""},"class_list":["post-79","page","type-page","status-publish","hentry"],"yoast_head":"\nRictus Barnfang's "Anti-Truth Tablets" - Anti-Pills<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/antipills.com\/index.php\/empty-medicine-jars-with-detailed-satirical-labels\/rictus-barnfangs-anti-truth-tablets\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Rictus Barnfang's "Anti-Truth Tablets" - Anti-Pills\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Solace Ex Negatium\u00a0 ''Comfort From Denial"\u00a0 . . . 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